Before we say our "I Do's"...

Something that I wasn't so keen on before hand was the dreaded pre-marriage classes. Both Josh and I didn't like the idea of sitting around talking about our private lives and personal beliefs with a room full of people. We had already (sort-of) read The Five Love Languages, and not to mention we have known each other for eight years - dated for 5 and a half - and been engaged for almost 11 months, so we felt like we knew what we were getting ourselves into.

 

But since we wanted one of the pastors from my family's church to officiate the wedding, we were required to take a six-week class. We were a little grudging about it because we were both in the middle of our intense internships (he was at a financial advising firm and I was at a wedding venue/bed and breakfast as an event coordinator), but eventually we worked things out and made it work.

 Surprisingly, it was nothing like what we had imagined. It was us and two other couples at the "instructors" house. We got a workbook to work through each week -

 

So we had homework in each chapter of the workbook, which was nice because it made us make time in our crazy-hectic schedules just to sit and be with each other. A lot of the chapters, we pretty much knew everything about ourselves and each other - but one or two chapters were absolutely great in helping us talk about things that we had never thought to (or were too embarrassed to) talk about.

Overall, it was a pretty good experience; we met a few great couples and learned a lot from them and their own personal experiences that they shared with us. We were never forced to talk about things that we didn't want to, and we never felt uncomfortable or like we were being judged. I think I'm glad we did it - it helped us become closer in a time when we couldn't be close.

Another book I would recommend for people considering marriage, engaged, or people who have been married for years already - is Dr. Gottman's book -

I got this book from my boss (who had just gotten engaged and married around the time I got engaged), and it's a great read - I suggest reading TO each other! It's great, non-bias advice, AND to make things better, Dr. Gottman is a Seattle-ite.

Do any of you have an opinion (or experiences) with pre-marriage counseling?